Today, I lost my log of writing ideas. It was an ongoing list I’d been adding to since September, and before I lost it, it had over 40 items.
Never mind how I lost it. All I know is that it’s irrecoverable. Not only that, but I also lost all of my recent dream logs, which I’d been planning to use as well.
I’ve been pessimistic about writing lately. It’s depressing to admit, but for the past week, these notes and logs were the only thing that made me feel like I had some place to go with my writing. Because my work in my notebook and book draft has been so discouraging, the only hope I had was in the 40+ ideas I could still rekindle.
It might not be as bad as losing a notebook or manuscript, but it’s still a heavy blow. I could probably re-log at least half of those ideas from memory, but some of those items were drafted sentences and paragraphs, and those I know I can’t recall verbatim.
I know looking back only hinders progress, but it’s hard not to when you’ve lost a bank of seven months’ worth of inspiration.